Suddenly Silence Seems So Simple
I wasn't sure how I would wrap this week up, since it didn't turn out like my typical weeks. Then I decided, I would wrap up my week. It's still the same, it's still the end of the week. Things that happened this week, are just a little different than usual.
As some of you know, I wound up in the hospital. It's funny, my kids are wild, but I would have totally preferred spending the days with their madness instead of in a hospital or lying around resting because that's all I could really do.
When I was diagnosed with Lupus, I was 21 and it came with the bombshell that my oldest daughter and I should have died during her birth. It was news that was hard to handle (needless to say), but then it came with a positive(at least I thought so at the time).
My Rheumatologist told me that my Lupus was mild and there was a really good chance that (other than when I'm pregnant) I won't experience severe symptoms. He said I should be fine and that aside from some arthritis, fatigue and headaches, I should grow old and die from age. Apparently (and unfortunately), he was wrong. Granted, it was inflammation (which is what arthritis is) that caused my problems this week, but still-it was dangerous inflammation and a little worrisome.
I don't talk much about having Lupus, I don't like the looks I've gotten from people when they find out...I don't like being pitied. I don't like people thinking I'm fragile. I'm not. Lupus doesn't run my life. I found out though, that sometimes you need to talk about it. Sometimes people need to know more, hell, I needed to know more. I had no idea that it was possible that my chest pain was due to my Lupus.
My kids were sad that I was in the hospital and they asked me to not go back. I can't promise them that, but I can skate around the subject. And that's what I did. They're too young to really understand Lupus, so with them, I will continue to keep silent. I won't talk about it with them and I won't allow them to have anything to worry about when it comes to my health.
A Moment of Silence
April 19, 2012 marked the 17 year anniversary of the Oklahoma City Bombing. That SO SAD day when a couple of idiots decided to bomb the federal building in downtown OKC-resulting in 168 deaths. Nineteen of which were children under the age of six. Take a moment of silence for those 168 lives lost, please-they deserve it.
I've Been Silent...
This week, and I apologize. With all the Lupus stuff happening, I've had a hard time getting to others blogs this week. I will do better next week though.
Sorry for the moments of Seriousness in this post and Sorry it was a bit long. But that's my week all wrapped up.
Happy Saturday :)