Happy Father's Day

This post is for the good Dads out there who love their kids, spend time with them, support them (in every sense of the word). For the Dads who take time to cherish the gift they've been given. Happy Father's Day to them, they are MEN and they deserve this day, hell, they deserve much more than a day. I love my Dad, and can't imagine not having him in my life.

However, this post is not just for those fantastic Dads. It's for those shitty ass Dads who make babies and don't take time to even care. Those Dads who either have one kid they ignore, or ten. The Dads who don't pay child support and don't think they "owe" anything to that child that is half of them. Happy Father's Day to them too.

I know some of you may be thinking-WTF?!?! So, let me explain. The good Dads out there, don't need me to say it, although I did because they deserve it. They will have someone (or a lot of someones) telling them all day long. They are wonderful fathers, and are recognized everyday. I'm going to take the time to recognize those who are bad fathers and aren't recognized. I'm doing it because, they should be. Point them out, announce to the world, tell them Happy Father's Day-make them see they ARE fathers. Whether they like it or not, they are. We ignore these scumbag dads who ignore the life they took part in creating. WHY?

Why do we let them get off so easy? We shouldn't. There are far too many kids out there with single moms who are the only support those children have, they work their asses off and they come home to play two roles-mom and dad. It's not fair. So don't say-Why should I tell that deadbeat Happy Father's Day? Acknowledge him, force him to remember that he IS a father.

My niece and nephew's dad is the defenition of a deadbeat. He has 8 kids (counting my niece and nephew) and he doesn't support any of them. Never spends time with them, doesn't call to talk to them, or even send a birthday card. My sister works hard to give them everything they need and make up for what they miss out on because they don't have a dad. She isn't always successful, but she does her best. Thing with my niece and nephews dad...no one makes him take notice. His family puts him on a pedestal and blames the mothers of his children for why he's not a real dad. You can't do that. If you know a Dad who makes excuses for why he's crappy, take a moment today to say-Hey, Happy Father's Day. Because he needs to realize he's a father.

That is why this post is dedicated to EVERY man who has a child...HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!

By the way- Happy Father's Day to the MOMs out there who play both roles. I'm one of those moms, I know it gets tough, REALLY tough sometimes. Just make sure you don't ignore the "man" who made you have to play both roles. Make sure he doesn't "forget."

(Sorry for the bit of ranting that went on there.)

And again, Happy Father's Day :)

Happy Mother's Day

(If you're here because my Goodreads review of Tangled Tides by Karen A Hooper said that I was going to review it, sorry. When I said that, I forgot it was Mother's Day. So, come back on Wednesday, May 16 and check out the review. :D  ) (AND everyone visiting, my awesome giveaway is going on-now until Friday-check it out here.)

Okay, moving on...

To all the mom's out there- HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!!!! I hope you have/are having a fantastic day. My kids may drive me crazy. Like PLEASE put me in a padded room, far far away from them, crazy. But I really don't mean that. I love my babies and I would be nothing without them. I'm a mom, and proud of it.

But I'm not going to talk about me, because there are moms who are so much more important than me. I say that because for one, I don't like to focus in on myself too much and for two, today is MotherS day, plural. It's a day for everyone in this world who is or has ever been a mom. It's for that woman with six kids, busting her ass at two jobs and still finding time to love all six of them with every bit of her heart. It's for that mom who knows what it feels to carry a life inside of her body. For the woman who was pregnant but unfortunately lost her baby. Or even the woman who gave birth to a baby, only to lose them after a few months. For the moms who play BOTH roles (mother and father). For the moms who get pregnant and then give their baby away (or have them taken by the state/a family member) because they don't want to be moms....guess what? You're still a mom, whether you like it or not.

My mom works hard every day, and when my sister and I were little, she busted her ass to be the best mom she could. And she's AWESOME. My sister and I are moms who play both roles. It's hard, but we manage. We make mistakes, but we do things right too. I've watched my niece and nephew turn into awesome teenagers (with minimal issues) and it was my sister who raised them that way. She's AWESOME. My Grandma on my dad's side raised 3 boys and 2 girls, mostly alone, and while working 2-3 jobs. Yet, she did it. My dad is the best man I've ever known. And it's thanks to his mom for raising him to be that way. She's AWESOME. My Grandma on my mom's side past away in 2008, but she raised 4 wonderful children. She was AWESOME, all three women she raised are AWESOME moms and the one boy is the second best man I know.

If you're a mom who is a loving, giving, caring, hard working, etc. kind of mom-HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY, you're AWESOME!

If you're a mom who hates her kids for ever being born, TOO BAD, you did it, you brought them here, get over it and love them. You are a mother, no matter how you feel about it. HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!

And to every mom in-between, HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!

Oh and I know there are dads out there who have to play both roles, so HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY to you as well.

Moms are AWESOME, take a moment to thank all the moms in your life and wish them a HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!

Happy Sunday to everyone reading this who is not a mom and Happy Mother's Day to everyone who is :D

Happy Easter!

Normally today would be a Something Sunday post, but I can't do that. I know I have followers of various beliefs and whatnot, so forgive me if you don't like to read the religious stuff.

I've said it before, but for anyone new-I'm Episcopal and I 100% believe in the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. I say this because...

Today is Jesus' day, who am I to take away from that by posting a recommendation to someone's site, or an awesome book, or someone else other than Jesus? I just can't do that.

Since I am not that religious person who thinks everyone who isn't religious (or even just people who aren't MY religion), should be-I can't push my beliefs on anyone, that's just not who I am. Therefore, I'm not 'recommending' that you celebrate Easter as a religious day. But, it is a religious day for me, and that is why I'm not posting a normal Something Sunday.

BTW-it's not strictly religious for us. We talk about what Easter means in terms of the religious aspect. But we also have an Easter dinner, my kids hunt eggs and they get candy from the Easter Bunny. So, I'm not saying that we only focus on the religious side of it, just that I acknowledge it is a religious holiday.

Anyway, I hope everyone has an awesome day, regardless of how you celebrate.

Happy Easter! :)

Birthday, Critiques, Schedule, A to Z

Okay, so this was a strange week for me. My mind was everywhere and nowhere and here and there....Crazy.

Monday my youngest daughter turned four. We had a party for her, invited a couple friends from her Headstart class (couple meaning literally two), and had pizza, cake and ice cream. I will freely admit, I am a pantser in writing and in regular life. Oh yeah, I love my to do lists, write them every day-even several times a day sometimes-but I suck at planning ahead. In fact, it was the morning of the party when I told the moms of those two kids what time the party would be. Yeah, go me, right? Ah well, it worked out. We had fun, although I had nothing planned to keep the kiddos entertained.

Something else that I did well with this week was critiques. I am usually so bad about it. I still have one crit for my group left, but typically, I still have almost  (or all) of them left even by now. (In my critique group we post a chapter or few on Sunday/Monday and then have a week to critique.) This week though, I was on point, for the most part. Something else that worked better this week...revisions! Yes, you read that right....my revisions were pretty good this week, YAY :)

My blog schedule has changed. Just to let you know:
Monday and Wednesday will still be the To Do List posts (we are now on the non writer to dos).
Tuesdays are now for poems OR random thoughts. Some days it's just easier to get some random things up.
Thursdays are still TAG!
Fridays are now open (except in April) I want to give my TAG! people more time to shine. Speaking of, Jacqueline Gardner was this weeks TAG! if you missed it-go here.
Saturdays are still the week wrapped up and Sundays are still Something Sundays.

And on to my last topic- the A to Z Challenge yep, talking about it again. :)  I decided I will have something I am doing for each letter. Not a theme exactly, just a little something. I will talk more about it either on March 31st or I will in my A post on April 1st (because that's the first day of the challenge in case you didn't know. Of course I'm sure you signed up, so you do know, right? If you haven't-go sign up).  I don't have a theme because I am not going to stray from my schedule and I have rules to posting more than once a day. I also wrote a couple more posts for April, YAY-I guess I do plan ahead sometimes.

So, there's the week wrapped up. Happy Saturday :)

Shrove Tuesday, Pancake Tuesday, Fat Tuesday, Mardi Gras

Call it what you want, but it marks the day before Ash Wednesday. Of course, depending on your beliefs, today can mean many things-or nothing. For me, it signifies the day before Lent begins. A day when I celebrate, confess, rejoice, and feast. A day when I indulge in whatever I will be 'giving up' for the fort days of Lent.

Mardi Gras is an overdone version of celebrating this day. People tend to party a little harder than the original intent of 'celebrate.' Mardi Gras AKA Fat Tuesday came about in France. It stems from the fact that originally all fats and fatty foods were consumed on this day to prepare for Lent.

Pancake Tuesday is more my style. Pancake Tuesday stems from the same concept as Fat Tuesday originally did. The traditional thing to do during Lent was to remove meats, eggs, fats, milk, and fish from your diet. So people feasted, sometimes from Sunday. I've heard many different things about how it used to work. But one thing that always stuck with me is this: Beginning on Sunday people began to feast, and continued feasting all the way to Tuesday. By the time Tuesday came along, there was mostly eggs, fats, and milk left-therefore, they made a feast of pancakes. I don't know how true this really is, but I do know that the pancake idea is a good way of getting rid of the ingredients that you cannot eat during Lent.

Now, I will get into the whole Lent subject more tomorrow in my Ash Wednesday post, but I'll say this: I'm Episcopalian, and I've always been. We've celebrated Lent always, from the time I was big enough to eat regular food. My children will also be following the ways I do during Lent. We are not as strict as it was back in the day, but we do follow a certain regimen. Tomorrow, the adults in the house will fast during the day (I don't ask my children to fast, but they are not allowed to eat meat and they are not allowed to have a super big breakfast/lunch. I don't do this to be mean, I do it because I think it's important. They will have the option of branching out to other beliefs when they are older, but for now, it is what it is.) For dinner we will have fish and a veggie or two, that's it. Friday will be the same way-every Friday leading up to Easter Sunday. I say all this to say, I do not do Pancakes today simply to get rid of ingredients in my fridge and pantry that would go bad otherwise (especially since aside from Ash Wednesday and Fridays, we do still eat meat), I do it because it is tradition. It doesn't hurt that my kiddos love pancakes :)

So whatever you call it, whatever you believe: Happy Shrove/Pancake/Fat Tuesday! Feast and celebrate, and have a fabulous day :D

Happy Valentine's Day!

This is one of my favorite holidays. Romance is a lovely thing, and today it's everywhere. This is the day for a man to stop procrastinating and finally, ask that special lady to marry him. It's the day when that little boy gets the courage to declare his "love" for the cutie in his class. The day for new love to blossom, and old love to be renewed. Romance is beautiful, and I'm not just saying that because I write romance. Can you say you don't agree it's sweet? If so, oh well, I love, love, and today is Love's day. Let's celebrate it.

Do something special for someone today. Show a loved one, or loved ones how much you love them. It can be something as simple as a card. Or even a post on someones Facebook wall that says, Hey, I'm thinking of you today.  Just do it. Kids, parents, spouse, lover, friend, it doesn't matter, as long as you let them know what they mean to you. And have a Happy Valentine's Day!!

Celebrate The Dream

Martin Luther King Jr Day is an important Holiday for me. It is to celebrate not only the memory of a man who put his life on the line to fight for equality and unity; but also to recognize what he was fighting for. I live in a place where it is very common for racism to happen daily. And not just racism-Oklahoma has so much discrimination, it's ridiculous.

My mom grew up in a time that racism was still happening-a lot. She told me a story once about a boy she liked and gave her number to. He called the house one day, and my grandpa found out he was not a white boy and my mom got in trouble-BAD. He was like that, always. I never knew though-he never showed that side of himself to me.

December 16-Heriza Kwanzaa, Happy Kwanzaa

Kwanzaa is 10 days away and it is expected to be celebrated by around 18 million people around the US. Kwanzaa was founded by Dr. Maulana "Ron" Karenga, a professor of black studies, in 1966. This year marks the 46th annual celebration of a holiday created to honor the values of ancient African cultures and inspire African Americans who were working for progress. A celebration that is based on the year end harvest festivals that have taken place throughout all of Africa for thousands of years, Kwanzaa gets its name from the Swahili phrase, "matunda ya Kwanzaa." Karenga chose a Swahili phrase because it is a language spoken by many people all over Africa.
Each of the seven days of Kwanzaa represent the Seven Principles(Naguzo Sada). Celebrants of Kwanzaa greet each other every day with "Habari gani" or "What's the news?" The answer is the principle for that day. The seven principles are as follows:
umaja(unity)-building a community that stays together.
kujicha guila(self-determination)-speak for yourself and make choices that benefit you community.
ujima(collective work and responsibility)-helping others work within your community.
ujamaa(cooperative economics)-support businesses that care about your community.
nia(a sense of purpose)-setting goals that will benefit the entire community.
kummba(creativity)-making the community better and more beautiful.
imari(faith)-believing that a better world can be created for communities now and in the future.
There are many colorful celebrations for Kwanzaa. A very important one is karamu. On December 31st families gather for the feast. Karamu may be held at a home, a community center, or church. During the feast traditional African dishes are served as well as dishes including ingredients brought to the US from Africa. These ingredients include sesame seeds, peanuts, sweet potatoes, collard greens, and spicy sauces. Especially at karamu, the holiday is celebrated with red, black and green. Green is for the fertile land of Africa, black is for the color of the people and red is for the blood that is shed in the struggle for freedom.
There are seven symbols that are used in the celebration of Kwanzaa:
kikambe cha umoja(the unity cup)-drank from in honor of their African ancestors. Before drinking each person says "harambee" or "lets pull together".
kinara(candle holder)-this holds seven candles, one lit each day of Kwanzaa. There are 3 green, 3 red, and on black in the center.
mishuma saba(seven candles that represent the seven principles)(see kinara)
mazao(fruits, nuts, vegetables)-to remind celebrants of the harvest fruits that nourish the people of Africa.
mkeka(mat)-the symbols of Kwanzaa are arranged on the mkeka, which may be made of straw or African cloth. Symbolizes the foundation upon which communities are built.
zawadi(gifts)-Traditionally educational and cultural gifts are given to children on January first(the final day of Kwanzaa)
vibunzi(plural, muhindi)(ear(s) of corn)-Traditionally an ear of corn for each child that is present is placed on the mat.
Although it has become more common for celebrants of Kwanzaa to also celebrate Christmas and New Years; at first only Kwanzaa was celebrated. The reason being that one should mix the Kwanzaa holiday with any other culture, to make sure the integrity of the holiday is not violated.
I myself do not celebrate Kwanzaa, nor do I know anyone who does, but I hope anyone who is interested in this holiday was able to gain some knowledge from this post. In addition, if I have left anything out-or misunderstood something(and you celebrate this holiday)-feel free to comment and let me know.
Heriza Kwanzaa, Happy Kwanzaa

December 15-Happy Hanukkah

In five days from today, at sunset, Hanukkah(also known as "The Festival of Lights") will begin and it will last for eight days. The Jewish who celebrate this holiday will begin by lighting the first (two) candles at sundown on December 20. I say two because the Menorah that is used has nine candles, eight for the eight days of Hanukkah and one extra to use in lighting each of the eight candles. It is forbidden to light any of the eight candles using any of the other eight celebratory candles. I have decided to write about Hanukkah in the topic for today, tomorrow will be Kwanzaa and the days leading up to Christmas will be about the way sub-religions of Christianity celebrate Christmas.
Hanukkah has a history that is not always completely clear, due to the different beliefs that can be found in Judaism. It is recognized by all Jewish people as a celebration of the take back and re dedication of the Second Temple. In 167 BCE a king by the name of Antiochus IV Epiphanes took over Jerusalem and banned Judaism, ordering an alter to Zeus erected in the Second Temple, in Jerusalem. Circumcision was banned and pigs were sacrificed at the alter of the Temple. A Jewish pries, by the name of Mattityahu, and his five sons led a rebellion against Antiochus. By 165 BCE the rebellion was a success and the Jewish people took back their Temple. The Temple was liberated and re-dedicated.
There was a Menorah located in the Temple that was lit using olive oil. The Menorah was required to burn each night. After the re-dedication, there was only enough olive oil to burn one day, but it wound up burning for eight. Eight days is how long it took to replace the supply of olive oil. This is one of the reasons that a Menorah containing eight candles (nine counting the Shamash, the extra light used to light each candle) is lit during the eight days of Hanukkah. It has been determined by many that the tradition of Hanukkah is to commemorate the miracle of the eight day long burning when the Temple was re-dedicated.
There is also another version of why the Jewish celebrate Hanukkah. That one being that there was an eight day celebration of songs and sacrifices proclaimed up re-dedication of the alter, this version has no mention of the oil miracle.
Rituals performed during Hanukkah vary, slightly. But it is definite that Hanukkah is not a Sabbath-like holiday and therefore there are no restrictions to a persons daily life. Adults go to work as usual, aside from sometimes having to leave early to be home by sunset for the light of the candles. Children go to school as usual, except in Israel. In Israel, children are out beginning the second day of Hanukkah, and then stay out of school until the holiday is over. Many families exchange gifts each night and typically fried foods are eaten. The Menorah, a nine branch candelabrum, is placed in either the window closest to the street, or near a door/doorway closest to the street. The Menorah consists of nine branches, but only eight are celebratory candles-the ninth branch is for the candle that is used in lighting the others. On the first day of Hanukkah, two candles are lit, one being the Shamash-which is the candle used to light the others, and the other one being the first candle of Hanukkah. Each day, the number of candles consistent with the number of days, is lit(example:day 4 you would light 5 candles total, the Shamash and then one candle for each day of Hanukkah). Friday is the only exception to the lighting at sunset, because Friday is the Shabbat the candle(s) for that day should be lit just before sunset. Each day the candle(s) must burn for at least 30 minutes past sundown(on Friday it will be a little longer than 30 minutes total because you may be lighting the candle(s) before sunset, but they still must burn for 30 minutes after sundown). Just before, or just after the lighting of the candles on the first day, three blessings are recited. After the first day, only the first two blessings are recited.
In North America, Hanukkah has gained increased importance because it typically falls right around Christmas time. Traditionally, Jewish children were given coins from their parents, but they started giving them gifts so they wouldn't feel left out-as children who celebrate Christmas get gifts during the Christmas season.
Both Israeli and North American versions of Hanukkah emphasize resistance, focusing on national liberation and religious freedom.
My children learn about different celebrations around Christmas, and I love the idea. It pleases me to know my children have the opportunity to learn how other children celebrate during this time of year. We, obviously, celebrate Christmas(and we celebrate it as Jesus' birthday, not only the commercialized ways), but I love to learn of the other ways people celebrate. I respect everyones different beliefs, and I wanted to share with you a little of what I know about Hanukkah. I hope that I did not leave too much out, or give too much-and anyone who celebrate Hanukkah....
Happy Hanukkah, it is a beautiful holiday.

December 8-Deck the Halls

Well I fell asleep last night prior to finishing this post and when I went to edit it-I realized I hadn't published my posts Dec2-7. I guess I was saving instead of publishing-that's why you should not wait until you are WAY past tired to get around to your blog. WOW- oh well, I got days 2-7 posted so if you are reading this one, wondering what happened to the others-they are now posted, sorry about that....

Here we are, 8 days in and 17 aways from Christmas and I have yet to decorate. I don't know what has happened this year, but I have not gotten around to setting up my Christmas decorations. My children are going crazy, begging me to get it done. It makes me feel bad that I have not made time to do so, but things are hectic around here-as is normal for Christmas time. I mean, I do have a few things out, but it doesn't really feel like Christmas until the tree is up. Even if you only put a small tree of any sort-do it. I remember one year I couldn't afford a tree so I improvised. We had a fake tree-like plant and I decorated it. I put garland and ornaments and even candy canes and we put all our presents under the tree-and it was great. The point of decorations, for me, is another sign of Christmas. It is a part of Christmas celebrations and traditions. No matter where you are in your life, find a moment, a way, to decorate. Even if you celebrate the Christmas season different-decorate for what you celebrate, but just do it. The joys of Christmas are not just in the things that happen in this season, they are also about being able to walk into your home and be reminded of what time of year it is. Without some kind of decorations to pick you up when you get down, it is harder to pick yourself up. It may seem silly, but its true. Whether you live alone, or with others, take a little time to Deck the Halls and celebrate Christmas-or whatever you choose, just celebrate.