Parents

I love and respect my parents although I haven't always done so 100%. But I was raised properly and I've always believed that people older than me deserve a certain level of respect. I can't respect every single person that is my elder because sometimes people just don't deserve my respect, but I do my best not to be rude.

Growing up it was important to me to show my parents a level of respect I believed they deserved. They both worked very hard to take care of me, they both tried to stick out a troubled marriage for me. My parents loved me and still love me unconditionally and no matter what mistakes either of them (or I) made/make, that love will never change and I know that. It's why I respect them no matter what.

So many people don't get parents. Or like my kids, they only get one because the other sucks. Or they unfortunately only get one because of loss. It's tragic to not know that unconditional love. Of course, some are lucky enough to find people to love them the same way and that's okay.

Sometimes we grow up and lose those feelings of unconditional love. Even if we still know our parents are there for us, ready to pick us up when we fall, we still forget that feeling. The -anything can happen to me and I'll be completely fine as long as I remember how much my parents love me- sort of feeling. It's a feeling that never leaves us, even if we forget it. It's something that will be there even if one or more parent is no longer here. It's a feeling that I hope each of you has had the chance to experience and one I hope to pass on to my kids.

The right parents (by blood or not) raise us to be better people, to improve the world, to contribute to it.

Happy Saturday. I hope you have a wonderful weekend. :)

NaNoWriMo

Okay, for the first time ever, I've jumped in and decided to participate in NaNoWriMo. My hopes are that this will help me to be more motivated and that I'll finally get some decent writing in. Since I am doing NaNo, there's a good chance I will post on here even less than I thought. Originally I'd planned to start getting back to my blog, but I don't see it happening while I'm trying to write a 50K word novel in a month, lol.

So, just wanted to give a little update and tell y'all what my plan is for the month. I'll see you all soon.

And on a completely different note...

Yesterday morning, a seven year old boy was hit and killed by a car while he was walking to his bus stop. I didn't know him, and I don't know his family (and I hate to talk about something so sad), but I wanted to ask that everyone please pray for his family and friends (or whatever it is you do when someone has had a loss like this). Also, the driver honestly didn't see the little boy, and they've ruled that it was an accident...So please, pray for that driver. I can't even imagine what they must be going through and feeling. But I can imagine that it's not something that will go away easily. I'm sure it will be heavy on that driver's heart for many years, if not always. So please, send out some positive to the driver as well. And keep this tragedy in mind as a reminder that you just never know. You never know when someone will be gone, so hug them tight, love them with all you've got and more, and cherish every minute.

Sorry, for the sad note for a minute, I just wanted to get that out.

Thank you for coming by to see me. Have a great Thursday. :)

First Loves Blogfest!!!

(Make sure you check out THIS PAGE for an AWESOME GIVEAWAY I've got happening right now :D  )


This is a blogfest by the AWESOME Alex J Cavanaugh.

How fitting that my first blogfest is a 'firsts' :)

I'm supposed to talk about my first loves: Song/Band, Book, Movie, and Person. This is exciting...

Band:


I almost did song, but I loved a variety of songs, so I went with band.

Aerosmith

Now, I've loved Aerosmith since I was very, very little. My dad would play their tapes all the time. Funny thing is that my favorite song of theirs was never one of his tops. Here's a video of my first song I absolutely loved by Aerosmith and really, I have no idea why I loved (and still do) this song so much, but ah well.

Of course, after Janie's Got A Gun-Cryin', Crazy, and Dude Looks Like A Lady are some of my other favorites. But in general, Aerosmith had/have some of my top favorite songs. Which is why they're my first band I loved.

Movie:

There is a tie between three for this one:

A Nightmare On Elm Street

IT

AND

Disney's Fantasia

(The original, not Fantasia 2000)

I mentioned it in a past post, but anyone who didn't see, I watched my first horror film (A Nightmare On Elm Street) when I was 2 with my dad (yeah, dad put me up on some great stuff, lol). I know it's funny to have Freddy and a scary ass clown in the mix with a Disney movie, but what can I say, I'm very versatile :)

Book:

Little Women by Louisa May Alcott

I've always been a reader. My mom taught me to read as soon as I could talk and I've been reading ever since. While I had many favorites, Little Women is one that I read a many times and loved it every time.

Person:

I met my first love when I was 13. We dated and were broke up by the time I was almost 16. Over the time between then and now, I've talked to him (even sparked a teeny bit of a relationship again sometimes), and over all the time (even though I've been with and loved others) he still has my heart. It's sad really, but it's true. He's the first person I truly gave my whole heart to and he's the only one who has ever had it. He could call me up right now and it'd be like he was never gone.

And that's it. I linked to the list when I linked to Alex's name, so check it out.

Thanks Alex for the blogfest and thanks to anyone who is stopping by :)

Are you participating in the fest? If not, what are your first loves? Did you have a good weekend? Have you entered my giveaway? If you haven't checked it out yet, do it. I've got some awesome prizes up for grabs. 

Happy Monday :)

My Love

The first day we met
I could see in your eyes
Determination, power
An ever burning fire

An angel
In every sense of the word
Beauty and passion
A fighter for sure

Attitude to keep me
Always on my toes
A heart so big
There's barely room to grow

Like the peace
Of a calm summer night
That I ever lived without you
Just doesn't seem right

Life will bring us struggle
Heartache and pain
I promise to be there
To shield you from the rain

My heart is yours
From now until death
My love remains
Stronger than the rest

This is a poem I wrote for my daughter. She turns 4 on Monday (March 12) so I wanted to post it for her-even if she can't read it :) Happy Birthday Asianae! :D

Love

Late on the poem again this week...Sorry y'all :)

Love


A mother's protection
A father's affection
A sister's objections
A brother's obsessions

A baby bird learning to fly
Its mom letting it go
A baby bear hibernating alone
During its first snow

A puppy given to a child
Learning all sorts of new tricks
A kitten given as a gift
Soft, warm, cuddly, the perfect pick

A couple in the park holding hands
Sitting on bench, discussing their life plans
A proposal as she stands
And of course an acceptance

A mother's gentle touch
Lying next to your puppy snug
Or something your man does
Bottom line, life is love.

Happy Valentine's Day!

This is one of my favorite holidays. Romance is a lovely thing, and today it's everywhere. This is the day for a man to stop procrastinating and finally, ask that special lady to marry him. It's the day when that little boy gets the courage to declare his "love" for the cutie in his class. The day for new love to blossom, and old love to be renewed. Romance is beautiful, and I'm not just saying that because I write romance. Can you say you don't agree it's sweet? If so, oh well, I love, love, and today is Love's day. Let's celebrate it.

Do something special for someone today. Show a loved one, or loved ones how much you love them. It can be something as simple as a card. Or even a post on someones Facebook wall that says, Hey, I'm thinking of you today.  Just do it. Kids, parents, spouse, lover, friend, it doesn't matter, as long as you let them know what they mean to you. And have a Happy Valentine's Day!!

I Love You

It is Valentine's Day after all :)

I Love You

I love your eyes
your lips
I love your hugs
your kiss

I love your voice
your words
I love your personality
your sweetness more

I love your hands
your arms
I love your strength
your hold

I love your smile
your skin
I love your color
your complexion

I love everything about you
everything you do
Simply said with three words
I love you

Love Is Lovely

Lust
Oblivious
Voluptuous
Ecstasy
Infatuation
Sensual
Arrogant
Liquor
Optimistic
Variant
Eccentric
Lingering
Yearning
Tantalizing
Hypnotic
Incredible
Non-peril
Glistening
Love is such a lovely thing

Close Your Eyes (Color Blind Part Two)

I debated whether or not to do both part one and two. The final decision was to put them both up. So, here is the part two of my Color Blind poem...

Close Your Eyes
(Color Blind Part 2)

Red, blue, green, yellow
Every color is unique
Each one
So pretty

Black, brown, tan, white
No color is superior
They're all equal
To each other

Yet discrimination
And separation, is everywhere
People judging by colors
From here to there

But some colors mix
To make a rainbow
And together they are
So beautiful

Don't judge something by color
Whether blue, purple, black or white
Just reach out with your heart
And close your eyes

How Do You Cope?

Many, if not all of my blog posts are inspired by events that occurred during the day-or at least the event brought on the idea. Tonight my children's Papa(on their dad's side)-John Henry Hill, Sr- lost his fight with cancer (at the age of 77). And between my ex and his siblings, my children and me-it made me curious, How Do You Cope?

Obviously, if you've read anything about me-or know me-you know I cry. Technically, I cry-I write a poem-I cry some more-maybe write another poem, and this is not necessarily the exact order of events, but that is how I cope. For me, nothing helps with the emotions better than crying until it's all out and then writing a poem (again, no particular order). I am different than a lot of people-I've been told by many, many people that I am beyond overly sensitive. I won't argue, sometimes I think my sensitivity is ridiculous-but that is who I am.

December 14-The Best Gift To Give

I am posting yesterdays post late because I was having a problem thinking of a topic. My daughter is in Headstart and she got a gift from them today. It was a tiger with a blanket, a t-shirt that has Headstart on it, and some candy. Then I remembered seeing a Kindergarten class at her school opening presents yesterday. I don't have a lot of money, my children(who go to different schools) get free breakfast and lunch, as do the rest of the kids at their schools. Majority of the families at their schools can barely get just one gift for their children, and some cannot get any. The kids in those families do not even really know the difference, Christmas is exciting enough. My children have presents to open on Christmas, but not an extreme amount, and a lot of it will be clothing. Money is hard to come by these days, for a lot of people, and it got me thinking about the best gift out there. No matter how much or how little income you have, you can still give the greatest gift there is-compassion.
For those that have money available, why not give something to a child that has nothing. For those who are like me and barely get by providing for there own family, give time, love. You could do this by any means. There are plenty of things that those less fortunate would be happy to have. Take some time to think about it. You could volunteer at a homeless shelter, the salvation army, or anywhere that distributes food to people who don't have any, or who don't have enough. Or there is always the Salvation Army bell ringing. Even if you have very little-there are many place that sell toys, coloring books, crayons, etc, for a very low amount. You could go spend a little change and donate to Toys for Tots-or just that innocent kid down the street who has nothing to open on Christmas morning. The point is whether it be time, money, or just love-give it because compassion for those with little or none deserve to have it, especially during this time of year. Give the gift of giving, it will make someone else smile and it will make you feel good.

December 13-All I Want For Christmas

So this is now day 12 and there are only 13 more days left. I don’t know about everyone else, but for me, Christmas is easing its way in very quickly. I realized that I feel a little sadder than usual this year. At first I was unsure why. But then I realized that I am missing something that I have had at Christmas time for 5 Christmases, this year would have been 6. About 5 months ago I completely ended my 6 year long relationship with the father of my children. Now, at the time it was a good idea, not saying that it isn’t right now, but at this time of year you may begin to doubt your decisions made throughout the year. We are better apart, but it is still cold and lonely without him. I haven’t missed him, until December hit. I have spent plenty of Christmases without a significant other in my life, but once you have children with someone your relationship takes on such a different role that it gets complicated. I do not want him, per say, but I do wish we were together right now. For many reasons-a big one would be the fact that I expected my kids to have both of their parents, at the same time, every holiday. And another up there reason is I miss the cuddling at this time of year. December is such a cold month. Just starting to have very cold, wet, sometimes snowy, days and nights-it makes you want to snuggle deep into the covers and into the arms of a loved one. I find myself thinking some nights how wonderful it would be to have his arms wrapped around me. I have not missed that-at all-until now. On the spending holidays together: I feel my children are being cheated by not having both parents in the house to celebrate Christmas with them. I had my mother and father until I was in eighth grade, every December-we decorated and did things as a family. I could be at home and enjoy both their company. I think had I been younger it would have affected me more. I know my kids wish their dad could be with them all the time like I am, it just makes me sad that I cannot give that to them. There are of course several other benefits of having a significant other during December, I will not list everything, I chose these two because they are what I miss the most.
So, for anyone who is without a lover, whether it be a mini relationship, or one that was long term, and you miss that lover this Christmas-I feel your pain. I know the heartache you are feeling-the sadness, doubts, &/or longing. For anyone who is not without that special someone, cherish it, work at it, work on it, enjoy every minute of it, and smile, for you are blessed. Take a moment to cuddle, snuggle, hug, love, whatever, but do it with happiness, because there are people out there who envy the gift you have, don’t waste it.

December 7-Frosty

Those nights you cant wait to get into your nice warm bed, and snuggle under the covers. The mornings you get up and there is frost blanketing the yards and covering your car windows. Running out to the car 10 minutes before you have to leave because if you don't warm it up you wont be able to see and you may mess something up.
On day seven I have decided to take time to recognize the cold, frosty, winter weather. Weather is also very significant to this time. I mean, I remember being little and wanting a white Christmas SO bad. I begged with Mother Nature to please let it snow for Christmas. Of course, as I got older, those pleadings for snow turned in to begging for it to not snow. I drive well, and I know how to drive in the snow-but I hate it. I would absolutely love it if it could snow snow snow-but not touch the streets. Here in Oklahoma we have the oddest weather and winter has been crazy the last few years. It was just last year that we had our blizzard-and snow like that just doesn't happen here. I am a winter baby and winter is typically my favorite season, but as a grow older I grow weary of the cold. I cannot stand to be cold. If I had to choose between being cold and being hot-I would definitely pick cold. But it doesn't mean I love it as much as I used to. At least when you are cold though, you can bundle up and cuddle up to get warm. In the summer months-there is no cuddling. Most days its more like-touch me and I may have to hurt you. Summer is sticky hot and Winter is frosty cold. We transition from warm weather to cold weather and that is something else that plays a part in the love of the Christmas season. People want to cuddle up to loved ones. We sit around drinking hot chocolate, cappuccino, coffee, tea, or whatever else your warm me up drink may be. This season causes us to spend more time inside, therefore more time together. It makes us have to find things to do together where we can be warm and still be entertained. So, snuggle up with your spouse, or your child(ren), your mother or father, grandmother or grandpa, your boyfriend or girlfriend, your friend(s) or even your pets-whoever you choose-just cuddle. It is the best way to spread the love and keep warm. It is just another blessing of Christmas, embrace it, and embrace someone you hold dear.

December 2-The Joys of Christmas

OK, here we are on day two of the countdown to Christmas and I have been thinking of all the joy that this time of year brings to me. The hustle and bustle. The decorations, at my home and all around town. The time with family. The lights in my little girls eyes. All the excitement of every child. The Christmas shows on TV, classics and new. The music associated with this time of year. The sign that I have conquered yet another year of the madness that is life. The giving, love, happiness, sharing, smiling, laughing. These are the joys of Christmas. I am sure that somewhere in there I missed things, there is so much to be joyous about during this time. I may be a little bias because I am not only a winter baby, but a December baby and one week shy of being a Christmas baby, but this is absolutely the BEST time of the entire year. December makes any troubles suffered the other 11 months all worth while. It makes every heartache, teardrop, and anger for someone or something-meaningful. December is the time when people are more caring. At least 50% of people are going to feel the Christmas spirit. People are going to give to the less fortunate-those that have been forgotten all year. Some will reach out to family they ignored January through November. Others will call up that friend they couldn't find time for. Strangers will speak to other strangers in the street-even if it is just a simple nod of the head-it happens during this time. I love it, every bit of it. My heart is huge-I always give when I can. Smile at the woman furious about-what? I don't know, but she needs a smile. I always donate food to food banks as often as I can. I donate all clothes my children and i outgrow and I do what i can for those who have less than I do(which trust me-is VERY little). Point is, I always give, i am that person who wants everyone to always be happy. That one who wants no crime to ever happen. I have never stolen, I don't cheat, I do my very best to never lie, i want everyone to love each other. This is my time-December is that one time of year that other people feel the way I do. The kindness that Christmas brings out in people is what is the most joyous part of Christmas for me. I enjoy seeing so much giving, so much caring, so much love. it makes Christmas the most wonderful time for me. So-my lesson for this post is short:
Think of all the joys of Christmas. Think of everything happy that you can during this time and embrace it. Take it all in and then-carry it over to January, February, March, etc. The kindness that makes December the most wonderful time of the year should not be reserved for Christmas only, it should be kept with you always...Let the joys of Christmas become the joys of the year.